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| eternal bliss |
| 05.31.04 (3:45 am) [edit] |
When you begin to try and describe a feeling, you feel so much at a loss. Language is so ill-equipped to describe these feelings for i'm sure that what I feel is completely different from what you do for the same thing. The only way that one can experience the same feelings is to feel them. The only true expression of feeling is when you ask someone to shut up! :D
Imagine a field of grass on top of a hill with a few trees, a golf course maintained by a misterous gardner. One of those trees with a hammock (that i put up) hanging of one of them. A tent in the middle of two trees, a fire burning to keep me warm (not to mention FOOD)...
I slept in the hammock till it started raining and then i ran into the tent. imagine me hopping all tucked into the sleep'g bag brrrr... it was cold!
anyway the drive, the camping & the cool weather was like complete bliss... i could have stayed there for eternity.
I think I finally understand what sting was talking about in the song "Fields of Gold".
I've taken some pictures of this amazing trip and I'll be putting them up soon. watch the space on the right...
The weekend was so amazing besides the obvious bliss that i was in, I also had some amazing coffee (in coffee estates) and drove through some amazing country side. You are all invited to come along with me.
After reading this for some reason this blog doesn't strike me as something I wrote so maybe i'll just modify it later. Till later though. wait for the snaps...
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| we are the world |
| 05.24.04 (2:13 am) [edit] |
ok!
day: [b]saturday[/b]
time: 6am
sleep duration: 2hrs
*shout*GET UP!!! WE'RE LATE... and i turn my head the other way and put a pillow (remember) on my ears...
suddenly everything went quiet, my body relaxed and i fell back into my sleep...
*SPLASH*, what the... i jump from my bed and race after my brother, catch him, drag him to the bath room and put his head into the bucket... there now i'm done :)
I get ready and we're off for a day at some place outside the city. btw i'm only going because my brother needs the car. anyway, we reach there & its lovely. A pool that we all just dive into (12 guys) and start play'g water polo in... (we won by 10 goals)
after the swim we're all famished and attack the food (it was bad) and then pla'd ping pong and snooker for sometime... after that, divided in teams of 6 we start play'g football... half with shirts and half without ;-)
sometime in the middle it started raining but the mighty warriors just kept play'g. then my bro, his frnd and i left and that was the end for us.
Day: [b]sunday[/b]
time: 4am
sleep duration: 4hrs
my neck hurts like hell and i just can't sleep. so i get up and prepare my cycle for the rest of the day! go for a run and then test out how my bike rides. great all set to protest against people using cars for short distances. [b]Car Free day[/b]...
we ride around the city on our bikes (abt 200 of us) encourag'g people to use cycles instead of cars for short distances atleast and all that... made some new frnds and enjoyed a lot. I also met some famous people, some RJ's, CEO of Phillips, etc. i come back watch the amazing F1 race and call it quits.
Day: [b]monday[/b]
time: 8am
sleep duration: 8hrs
yes, yes, yes! i slept 8 hrs, thank u god! sitt'g on my bed read'g the paper and guess what!!!
u'r truely is in the paper because of my efforts on sunday...
i think i should stop now!
ps: the day gets worse...
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| ..:: Joy ::.. |
| 05.20.04 (3:46 am) [edit] |
Trying to write something a little more upbeat. Inspired by a lovely poem by Kendy.
This is dedicated to kendy and u princess. thy friend.
here goes.
[u][b]Joy[/b][/u]
The hero in your songs,
The muse of a painting,
The love in her heart,
The air in each breath,
That’s what I feel like,
A child with a toy,
When you hold my hand,
Like a little boy.
The light from the sun,
The rain in the dry,
The one and only,
A gin soaked boy.
That’s what I feel like,
A child with a toy,
When you leave my hand,
The city of Troy.
The sweetness of sugar,
The colors on a palette,
The shades of grey,
Water to palliate…
That’s what I feel like,
A child with a toy,
When you hold my hand,
The feeling of joy.
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| held at gunpoint |
| 05.17.04 (1:30 am) [edit] |
just the other day i was telling Species how weird it is to be held at gunpoint.
The problem with me is that i've stared into the barrel of a gun [b]six[/b] times this friday. Why, please don't ask but i'm so scared about this... Who knew my past (not that i'm too old) would keep haunting me this way. The first time it happened, i was $hit scared. trembling & everyone around me running around trying to do all sorts of things...
I WANT THIS TO END. damit...
Anyway after all this time i've learnt that i'm being scared not because these people want to scare me but rather someone else. (Sorry about being so abstract)
that was what my friday night was like... nice starting to a weekend. Saturday i was woken up by mom & i got up shouting, completely freek'g her out. she refused to let me stay home (something i'm thankful for) & draged me along with her & dad to see homes & plots to build a home. Took some nice snaps (coming soon...)
After com'g home one of my neighbours called me tell'g me that he had a pass to a "fasion show" with a dance follow'g it. Called up some frnds & finally took a girl from the campus that i stay at. Nice gal & all but what was more interesting is that i got to [b]dance[/b] after soo long. It was awesome.
Swamy get a cell phone...
Sunday morning, i think i slept for like 30 minutes (after sat, i was sure my sleep'g trouble was over), i woke up to an empty house. My room is in the edge of the house so no one disturbs me. Got out of bed asked for some eggs and bread and cold coffee... sat out on the cane swing & enjoyed my breakfast in the cool wind.
after mom and dad came back, ma made me some really great food *yum* but still that health stuff and i was crav'g for some junk...
in the evening went to the Bose showroom so mom & dad can buy a home entertainment system. Just sat for soooo long listening to the amazing music. Came back with a BIG pizza & mom made some great pudding. *i can still taste it* ending my weekend in a big slice of cake, jelly & custard *smack*...
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| ..::You::.. |
| 05.12.04 (4:27 am) [edit] |
..:: You ::..
:::::::::::::
Sitting alone on this altar,
Sharing my thoughts & feelings with my shadow.
Making that dangerous confession,
Every time I find myself here in rapid succession.
Leaving the world,
Leaving their thoughts,
There is no one I can see or feel,
‘Cause I’m the one who has cut them off.
Nor Betty neither Veronica,
Can get this guy, I will not let them,
For you are all, for u are my all.
How you sit with me,
With your head on my shoulder.
How you contemplate,
Even my wildest reverie.
The sweetness of each kiss,
The tenderness of your touch,
Nothing can make me change this moment,
No amount of happiness,
No amount of doves.
I knew I could lean on you,
I knew you’d be there,
And yet I find myself here,
Sitting alone on this curb,
Speaking to my shadow,
As each car goes by,
Lightened for a brief second,
Only to be left blinded by the darkness.
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| A City of angels |
| 05.10.04 (4:33 am) [edit] |
the weekend was what most might consider, coooooool...
saturday after fight'g myself up from bed, i lazily crawled my way into the bathroom and washed up. After all swamy, gujju and I had to go see a movie. Scary Movie was play'g at a movie theatre but as our luck would have it, the movie was no longer play'g anywhere in the City.
We ended up at a coffee shop (Barrista) with gujju and swamy praying for the two girls who were sitt'g on the table across us ;-) but as luck is running a little low in the group the ladies didn't even know that we existed...
anywho! after the coffee we ended up at a bookstore + music store and we ended up buy'g some, quite some stuff. Bought the new album by Norah Jones, its nice, i really like it.
Then as most saturday night's we ended in a Bar waiting for a frnd of swamy's (refer: mangalore) to arrive. He never showed up. Swamy ended up drinking two pitchers of beer with me mix'g my drinks (7'up and Sprite)...
sunday the two of them landed at my place at about 3pm with a CD of [b]Forrest Gump[/b]... sometime inbetween the heavens opened up, pour'g all their love on our little town.
reminds me of something
[i]The rain comes down,
to wash this dirty town...[/i]
after having some coffee and snaks we went back in and saw [b]City of Angels[/b] *sob* last time i saw it i was ly'g down in her arms....
(i miss u)
anyway after that we went (in the rain) to a dhaba (open road side restaurant) and ate some good food. after that we went back to my place with the two of them stay'g over ending what was a really nice weekend...
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| bullet or staying... |
| 05.04.04 (4:03 am) [edit] |
i reach out my hand to u,
only to find u pull away further.
i ask y i can't see u,
only to be greeted by a deafening silence.
I sit in the corner, some song playing,
contemplating between a bullet and staying.
out in the world trying to find my calling,
i come across you at every quoin.
wonder if you remember our reverie,
or is it me that's unwilling to be woken.
I need to love again,
I need it for her,
cause she won't wait for me,
till i can fight all sentiment.
Please set me free,
set me free again.
I want to live, will u help me breath again?
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| ? good or better ? |
| 05.02.04 (1:12 am) [edit] |
well some days in your life are good and some days are not so good.
Yesterday was one of those days that was good but today is something that's even better. I got a raise, got some stocks also got a promotion.
But does it all matter? Heck yeah! after all what's life without rewards?
but...
what's life without the one u love? Well G' if u ever read this then i really love you a lot and wish we could at least b friends again. I miss u a lot every day that i wake up and every night that i sleep (whatever little). You were, are and will remain my true love. Hey! i know that's a little mushy but that's the way i feel about u. I don't even know if we'll ever talk again, don't know that if we do what'll happen. But be good dear girl, be careful and never forget to love.
anyway enough of the mushy stuff. I've been sing'g and danc'g the last few days sooo much that i think it's become more of a reflex.
So people life free, happy as each day is good and the ones that aren't are better...
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